Alma 32:41

...Nourish the tree as it beginneth to grow, by your faith with great diligence, and with patience, looking forward to the fruit thereof, it shall take root; and behold it shall be a tree springing up unto everlasting life.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Pity Party and the clean up

Today has been a failure. I have been on the computer too much, had the tv on too much, yelled at Kaden too much, ignored cleaning too much, been impatient and unreasonable too much. The clincher was when I laid down for a short nap and Asher woke up. I cried. He's been keeping me up a lot lately and I am fighting a cold so it was pity party time. I whined and complained in my head for a few minutes. Then I stuck Asher in the exersaucer(serves him right for waking up- take that! play with some toys while I make faces at you and scare you with the vaccum cleaner!) and cleaned the living room. I needed a space of sanity. I needed to accomplish something. It feels good to have the floor clear even for a few minutes. I will enjoy sitting on it and typing for a few more minutes and then I will throw some toys out and let Asher play. I realized that I believe in a few cleaning myths...

a) That cleanliness will radiate out from one clean room and soon the whole house will be clean. I keep thinking that if I have the main two rooms clean then we can get to the rest of the house and clean it really well. Somehow I am always spending my time cleaning the main two rooms (and bathroom) and the rest of the house ... well let's just say I am thankful for closed doors and few visitors.

b) That I can get cleaning done when Matt is home over the weekend. Nope, House always looks worse on Monday...

c) That Matt understands my cleaning thought processes and will just magically do jobs (since he must enjoy cleaning more than I do. :) ). I left boxes by the front door to go in the garage just assuming he will do it( because he won't have to carry the baby and the boxes). I get annoyed when I see them still there but I don't think I ever told him to put them away. Or... I empty the dishwasher and think " good now we can put dishes in here instead of the sink. I leave an unwashed dinner pot in the sink (since it can't go in the dishwasher) and so Matt doesn't even think to check if the dishwasher is empty or not because of the dish in the sink and just adds his to the new pile. arghhh...

d) It's ok for me to make a mess and leave it out for days... but not anyone else. Yeah... I'm a punk.

O.k. now I need to get back to work restoring sanity to my house. Time to clean up the pity party and bash some myths out of my brain.


Michelle Williams said...

I love that you are trying so hard, but don't be too hard on yourself.

One thing about cleaning house I had to learn the long/hard way,(yes I'm stuborn) is how empowering it is to have things in order. I feel so much more relaxed, happy and in control of my world. When I feel that way my creative juices soar and that makes it worth the work!

Love you bootle, you'll get there.

Heidi said...

I always leave the dishes on the weekend assuming that my husband will WANT to do the dishes to show how much he loves me. That's wrong pretty much every weekend.